I miss my life. I can’t help it. When I am viewing social media, and I see all the post of families together, sharing pictures of an abundance of love, it makes me miss what I had even more. The coronavirus adds an intensity of the loneliness and depression I could have never imagined. I often wonder how the rest of my widowed friends are handling this. Most I know have a family at home. It has to help, but I am sure they are missing their loved ones. I also know some who don’t have a family at home and might be experiencing some emotion.
I believe God makes a place for the lonely. A place where he can work in us. I know it feels impossible to escape this place right now. This feeling of loss, loneliness, and depression, but I know God’s home is and always will be beneficial to me. And as much as I would like to avoid it. It is a place I must lean into. God will never forsake me; he will transform me. I believe God has been changing me and will continue to for as long as I am alive. This place I am in right now is just a place I must travel through.
When I come upon days like this when I wish I had my old life back. I try to remember to be grateful. Grateful God gave me the gift of my husband, John. God gave me the blessing of two wonderful boys. God gave me the grace of love. I got to experience love.
With each passing day, I hold onto hope. I do my best to take moments of stillness and be thankful for what I had and what I have today. I hike in nature to keep my self grounded and busy. Listening and seeing all the power God has in his daily creation. It humbles me.
As time goes by, the loneliness will get a bit easier. God will have restored me. Made me even stronger than before. I am a different faithful servant. I will let God’s loving-kindness be upon my life forever. I will continue to let him lead my way.
Luv, luv,
Julie 💙
If your alone and widowed, my heart goes out to you. The isolation is hard,
and you will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.
